Mark Easton...and Courage

I had very mixed feelings as we set up the gear for the New Years Eve gig at the local bowling center's bar. As I looked around, I thought to myself ..."what the hell are we doing here?" It just felt wrong. This was not what this band was about. It felt like we were surrendering to all the naysayers who had said we were just another local band. I knew that we had already proven that wasn't true. But there we were, nevertheless. I decided to try to make sure that the room's drawbacks didn't keep the band from being what we were...a concert act, with a record. If we were going to play, we were going to do it right. We only brought in half the stage gear and PA, and we set up and sound checked by late afternoon. The sound in the room was quite good, and I convinced myself that this might be OK...Mark was still sick, but he was determined to show up and play anyway, and I couldn't help but feel incredible gratitude for his committment to the band, since I knew how weak he had to be, and what an extraordinary amount of desire and will he was summoning up to be there at all. It was inspiring to me. I looked at my "poor us" attitude...then I looked at him...and I made up my mind at that moment to treat this gig exactly the same as every other gig we had done. The size of the room didn't matter. Avalanche was unstoppable, unless we decided to stop ourselves...Mark wasn't letting Hepititis stop him...and it was then I decided...I wouldn't let self-pity stop me. From that moment, the attitude in the room, once again, became strictly business. I also learned something at that moment. A band isn't defined by the size of the room it plays...it is defined by the power of it's own belief in itself. The music makes the band...not the venue. I knew Mark was still far from 100%, but wild horses couldn't have kept him away. I realized that my desire to have him in Avalanche was an inspired decision...that on this day, he probably wasn't feeling a lot different than he had felt that first day he had jammed with us, and decided to join the band. Although he had been sick then, he had felt inspired by us...and now...I was feeling inspired by him. He was an unstoppable force...and I was glad he was my friend..